But he did it first

In my upcoming book, You First: Inspire Your Team to Grow Up, Get Along, and Get Stuff Done, I talk about the five things you can do to change your team for the better.  The first of these is to Start with a Positive Assumption.  As team members, we each have a responsibility to overcome the automatic and unconscious filters our brain uses that cause us to react to messages from people we see as hostile. More on that here.